Sunday, July 1, 2012

my friend

One of my dearest friends, who I met through adoption, lives in Nevada. 
In her Testimony meeting today a man bore his testimony that "Living the gospel brings happiness".
I completely agree that living the gospel brings happiness. I also know that no one is perfect, and that is why we have the atonemtent and are able to repent and be happy. But, in his testimony, he shared a story about his sister, that she had placed a baby 5 years ago.  He told of the girl that becamer pregnant out of wedlock, and that her life has been ruined since that moment; because she didn't live the gospel.

Now, that last sentence I couldn't disagree with more.  
One of the reasons that my blog is called "Destination", and why the quote at the top says what it does, is because ever single choice has a destination.  I did become pregnant out of wedlock. I did have a child and place it for adoption. Having that baby is NOT what has made life difficult. LIFE, made life difficult.  Just because I had a baby before I was married, and placed, has no link to why things in my life have been hard. No, they haven't been hard for a straight 8 1/2 years. But there have been MANY moments in the last 5 eyars that have been so faith breaking, that my own testimony was shaken.  My Destination because of havinng premarital sex was becoming pregnant, it was then another set of choices on where my destination would be after that, so on and so on. Every choice takes us in different directions. Choosing to have sex made some moments in life hard. It didn't, however, make every other single thing hard.

I don't belive that many people reallu understand the atonment, repentance, and our Heavenly Fathers Plan, in so many ways.  This girls life is not hard because she had a baby out of wedlock. Her life could be hard for many different reasons. She may be choosing to live in a way that he finds wrong, and he is placing blame on a choice made years before. I have not had a hard time in the last 5 years because I became pregnant 8 years ago. I have had hard times because my husband lost his job, and things have been rough since then. I had been living the gospel, to the 100% fullest of my capabilities, i was doing my best, and I knew that HEavenly Father knew my best was enough. That doesn't mean that life is going to be easy. It doesn't mean that my life will be a life without trials. My chioce doesn't change my destination, it just changed the road I was going on.  I had to made different choices to get back to the path that i wanted, that was going to bring ME happiness.  

Its hard hearing of someones lack of understanding of something. And maybe I am wrong as well, maybe he doesn't have an understanding because he hasn't been taught, or LISTENED, when he was?  

For those of you who have no idea what the crud a Testimony is:  In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, we hold a meeting called Sacrament meeting.  It is basically where the whole congregation(in that area designated into ward boundires) comes together to listen to talks.  TESTIMONY MEETING is every month, on the first Sunday of the month. It is Sacrament Meeting with no talks, where members of the congregation can go to the pulpit and share their Testimonies of whatever they want. It is intended to help us all feel the spirit and learn from others, without being asked to speak on a specific subject.  
The Atonement: In definition is to ..."Suffer the penalty of sins..." look HERE for the full definition.
We believe that Jesus Christ suffered and Atoned for our sins in the Garden of Gethsemane and on the Cross at Calvary.

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