I celebrated my first ever Birth Mothers Day. It wasn't anything extravagant, it didn't include family, it wasn't a SHOUT IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS day.
But I did learn some things. I did meet some amazing adoptive family. I met some even more amazing Birth Mommas. And I found out that celebrating this day is OK, and even fun:)
LDS Family Services in Southern Utah hosts a Birth Mothers Brunch on Birth Mothers Day. I don't know if that is just something that they do down here only or not(I've been out of the loop for a while). Either way, an Adoptive Family invites local Birth Mothers to their home, and make breakfast/brunch/lunch. I am absolutely AWFUL and forgot the families name that hosted this year, but their home was beautiful, their children were beautiful and kind and loving, and the women who attended were AMAZING. I didn't get a chance to talk to all of them, but I did hear a few conversations, and realizing that people and move forward and progress and LIVE 25+ years after placement was awesome. It was also amazing to see the love and support they had to offer those who were more recent to the Birth Mother life. And the tender and sincere love they had for all of us.
We ate some AMAZING waffles, and I did indulge... BAD BAD IDEA... but heck they were good. They had goodie bags with gift cards and everything. It was truly awesome to see the love they had for all of us. And how much fun it was to be there with these people.
I later got to spend some time with my little brother! The one who was the very first ever to say "Hey I get to be with you on Birth Mothers Day.". Again, there were no fireworks, or big displays of awesomeness, but there were words. Words I had NEVER heard uttered from a family members mouths before!
I even got to hear my little babies tell me happy Birth Mothers Day! It was so sweet, and so fun, especially when I get to hear my little #1, Lou, tell people how proud she is because her "mom is special because she is a special birth mom.". Oh it made my heart drop.
As the day wrapped up, I laid in bed with gratitude in my heart. I was extremely nervous to attend this brunch, because I'm not from here, and they welcomed me openly to the party. I was nervous that it would be filled with heartache, and sadness. That these women would share all the pain that we have felt. But it was the complete opposite. It was filled with laughter. It was filled with love, and stories being shared of whose adoptive couple was cooler. It was shared about how different EVERY story was. How different adoption was 25+ years ago, to 10 years ago, to now. How we all are making it and striving to be better. To make the necessary sacrifices to be where we want to be, no matter what that place to be is. It ended with FRIENDSHIPS, that started because of adoption, but ended with a lot more in common than just that. It was amazing, and I hope that I can spend the day, or at least a few hours, with Birth Mothers on this day for years to follow!!!!!! I am so happy that I went. I am so happy that it wasn't what I thought it was going to be. I AM HAPPY, that i was able to CELEBRATE Birth Mothers Day. And in doing so, it didn't need to be flashy or crazy or anything other than the company of AMAZING women, and friends!!!