Thursday, June 14, 2012

Why Not Abortion?

There were many reasons that I did not choose an abortion.

1. I was not comfortable with it.
2. I had was against my religion.
3. It was the easy way out (in my opinion)

Here is an official statement of the LDS church on abortion,

"The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints believes in the sanctity of human life. Therefore, the Church opposes elective abortion for personal or social convenience, and counsels its members not to submit to, perform, encourage, pay for, or arrange for such abortions.
The Church allows for possible exceptions for its members when:
  • Pregnancy results from rape or incest, or
  • A competent physician determines that the life or health of the mother is in serious jeopardy, or
  • A competent physician determines that the fetus has severe defects that will not allow the baby to survive beyond birth.
The Church teaches its members that even these rare exceptions do not justify abortion automatically. Abortion is a most serious matter and should be considered only after the persons involved have consulted with their local church leaders and feel through personal prayer that their decision is correct."
The link to the statement is HERE. There is also some additional information about my church's beliefs on that HERE

Even though I was stupid and young, I knew that just because I was irresponsible and immature, did not justify this life inside me being killed.  I have, since I became pregnant, thought this; "If I thought I was mature enough to have sex, I thought I was mature enough to deal with the things that could happen." I use that quote often, to young girls/kids. Because I believe that if someone thinks that they are mature and responsible enough to have sex, they must thing that they are mature enough to deal with a pregnancy, or even an std.

I was not raped, and this baby was not a threat to my health, and it was healthy.  I don't feel that my choice in adoption was an easy way out either. I feel that I made a mature and responsible decision to place my child in a home with 2 parents, who loved each other. I chose to give him MORE than I possibly ever could, and to have him somewhere stable, safe, and he would be with them eternally.  I made the choice to have sex, therefore I made the choice to accept the consequences of that action.

The night we told the BF's dad, he asked about an abortion, our answer was no.  I don't know if the BF really didn't want to have one, or was being respectful to my feelings. Either way, I am grateful that he supported me in my decision to not have an abortion.  However, his dad disagreed. I'd never seen his dad as much as I saw him in those first couple weeks after telling him of the pregnancy.  And in all the times I was around, he asked me if I wanted to have an abortion. Even, at one point, telling me that he would pay for it, and I could do it somewhere else so that no one would know. And then, no on would ever even know that I'd become pregnant.  I didn't not want to have an abortion so that I wouldn't be judged for being an unwed pregnant teen. (did that even make sense?)  I would know, every day, that I had a baby, and I took its life. I took its chance away at life. I would know that, even if I didn't want him, that there was a family somewhere in this world that DID want him, and would have done anything to have him.  
Finally, after being taken to dinner and being talked to again about it, i firmly said no. And, if I remember right, the BF told them not to talk about it anymore.  His dad disappeared... and I don't remember seeing him all but 1 time in between that night and the birth.  

I don't feel that having an abortion is right, when a girl makes the decision to have sex before marriage.  If you are not ready, or are to young, or feel that being a mother/parent right now is not right, then think of the child, and all that he/she deserves. There are so many families who can't have children... who are waiting and trying to adopt!  Its not an easy way out. It is not a cop-out, it is a mature and DIFFICULT decision.  So difficult, that I didn't finally decide, FULLY, that it was the right thing for me until sometime in August. I had E in September...

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