November is already half over.
This year, and this month, have been the craziest (as far as adoption goes). The amount of people I've met, heard from, befriended, its pretty much the most incredible year yet. And, I have also learned a lot.
I have been dong the BTG Photo a day challenge, and in the midst had a very emotional experience. I am often able to attend a support group for expectant mothers. I like to go to show that there is life after placement, that it does get easier, and that the angel boy I placed is amazing. I don't have much experience with closed adoption(or adoptions closing after being told they were going to be open). But there are a few girls experiencing this exact thing, and others close to.
One amazing birth mother came to show her support and share he own experience with her adoption closing after 2 years. I had never heard her story, I had only known that 2 years after placing the family chose to close the adoption. And NO, she was NOT one of those crazy birth mothers. She never asked for anything, and never implied she was anything but a birth mom. She didn't want to take her, she didn't want to be her mom, she simply wanted to show her love for that baby just like we all do.
She shared some pretty stinking tough and hard experiences, and had some even more amazing advice to one birth parent in particular. It doesn't hurt to share, because she influenced more than that one birth parent, IM SURE.
I have been back and forth about my involvement in the adoption community. About the love and support, or lack of, in the adoption community where Im located. I have been on the burner of what I have shared, and what I want to continue to share. And this amazing girls courage and words have influenced me a LOT. I don't have a clue what Im doing yet... but I am working on it.
That being said, here's my post for National Adoption Month.
Adoption is amazing, and hard, and happy, and crappy, and the biggest blessing that came to my life. It has brought an onslaught of love, and a very small bit of negativity. I have met the best of friends because of adoption, and have been able to see their stories unfold as my did, with faith, and love, and fight. I have seen, from afar, the amazing thing that is a Hopeful adoptive couple, become Mom & Dad. I have missed, terribly, the small group of women that influenced me and my story for the first time in the adoption community. I have cried for those who have waited... and waited ... and waited... for their miracle babies. I have cried more for those who are STILL waiting. How I wish I could find the families that belonged together. How I wish I could be the "finder" of those birth families, to match with their adoptive families.
I cry with those women, who have to decide what road to take. Place a child they love, or parent a child they love. To see SO MANY teenage girls pregnant, and naive, and not worried about a thing. And crying more, when these birth parents come and share the joy and pain of labor, birth, and the few days/day they spend with those gifts from above. Then to hear the pain of placing them into anthers arms, knowing how it hurts, but how right it is.
Adoption isn't for everyone, but it sure was for me, and advocacy can be for everyone.
I'll be posting, daily, and little blurb about some families that are waiting for their miracles. I know I don't reach a whole amazing number of people. I am not "fan" material(thank goodness), but maybe someone will see their profiles and share it with the one who is supposed to see it.
- Jena
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